Dear Abby: My friend keeps comparing her dog’s death to my son’s suicide

DEAR ABBA:

A dear friend with whom I have lived for 12 years recently lost her beloved dog (which she called her third child) due to old age. She decided to put the dog down due to health problems and has been plagued by guilt ever since.

10 years ago I lost my 19-year-old son to suicide. It was the worst decade of my life and I mourn it every day. My friend equates the death of her pet with the death of my son, which has caused a major rift in our relationship. It is not only offensive, but also extremely painful to hear that the passing of a pet is as painful and tragic as the loss of my son.

I have told her repeatedly that the loss of a human child cannot be compared to the loss of a dog “baby”, and she still refuses. How should I deal with her and this situation? Your advice will be very valuable. — CRYING MOTHER IN THE SOUTH

dear, grieving mother:

I’ll cut you some slack because he’s in pain right now, but he’s delusional. The pain of sending a beloved pet over the Rainbow Bridge and the pain of losing a child cannot be compared, and the fact that she said it – not just once, but kept saying it over and over again – is ridiculous. The best way to deal with this woman would be to distance yourself until she regains perspective.

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