Gisèle Pelicot changed the script of shame for rape victims

Warning: This article contains descriptions of sexual assault

Gisèle and Dominique Pelicot lived in an idyllic pink house in Mazan, a village of about 6,000 inhabitants in southeastern France. It’s the kind of charming, sun-drenched Provençal villa you’d coo over if it were listed on VRBO. But a monster lived in this villa.

Dominique Pelicot is accused of inviting dozens of other monsters via the now-defunct erotic website Coco.fr inside the house to rape his unknowing wife, whom he induced into a stupor, for nine years from 2011 to 2020. Mass rape trial, which started in September and is scheduled to end in December, has shocked France.

It’s impossible to think about this case without tears in your eyes, boiling bile in your stomach and admiration for the woman who rose from the ashes of this unimaginable situation. Gisèle Pelicot (72) made the brave decision to pursue the case in public, abandoning the privacy shield under which rape cases are usually heard.

“It is not ours to be ashamed of; it’s for them,” she said.

It was called the so-called feminist icon around the world, sparking protests in her name across France. As she enters and exits the courthouse in Avignon, where the trial of 51 accused rapists is underway, she is greeted by applause. “We are all Gisèle,” read the handmade inscriptions. And: “We see you, rapist, victim, we believe you.”

This week, Gisèle appeared on the witness stand for the first time and when she addressed him, she did not want to look at her now ex-husband. “How could you betray me until this moment? How could you bring these strangers into my bedroom? A rapist, she said, “is not someone who stands in a parking lot at night.” She also simply said, “I am completely destroyed.”

The “normality” of the Pelicots, as well as many other accused rapists, is one of the reasons this case is so shocking. The Pelicots are parents of three children and grandparents of seven who have been married for 50 years. Before retiring, Gisèle was a logistics manager and Dominique was a real estate agent. The 50 accused attackers, aged 26 to 74, include a plumber, a city councilor, truck drivers, a soldier, farm workers and a journalist. Graffiti on a wall near the courthouse reads in translation: “Ordinary people, terrible crimes.”

Dominique was caught after he was arrested for filming women’s skirts in a supermarket. Police found a terrifyingly detailed set of records relating to the assault on his wife. In a folder marked – impossibly – “Abuse,” he kept approximately 20,000 photos and videos of men raping his wife while she was unconscious. Why did he keep these records? “Part pleasure,” he told the court, “but also part insurance.”

The way Dominique behaved when Gisèle was awake was even worse. “He prepared a lot of meals. I saw it when he was attentive,” Gisèle testified, describing the mashed potatoes covered in olive oil that he gave her. She talked about the raspberry ice cream that her husband brought her to bed. She said these details now haunt her: Dominique admitted he administered sedatives this way.

Over the course of nine years, Gisèle lost weight, hair and time – and reported severe memory lapses that she believed were related to neurological problems. She also suffered from gynecological problems. (One of the alleged attackers, accused of raping her six times, is HIV-positive and refused to wear a condom.) Dominique took Gisèle to the doctors to get the answers he had.

Complicity, double personality – it’s hard to understand. It must be crushing to try to separate the partner she thought she had known for so long, from a man who would ritually abuse her.

This is getting scarier, if that’s even possible. Dominique had an elaborate plan to avoid detection. He told the men that they should leave no marks so as not to smell cologne or cigarette smoke, and told them to warm their hands on the radiator before touching his unconscious wife so as not to wake her up. If she moved, they were told to leave.

Dominique confessed to rape. “I am a rapist, just like everyone else in this room,” he told the court. Fourteen identified men (there were 72 in Dominique’s molestation files) also confessed to rape. The others pleaded not guilty. They, they argue, were victims of Dominique too, caught up in what they believed to be kinky, consensual sex games. Yes, even though Gisèle was unconscious, it was felt that Dominique’s word amounted to consent.

Dominique didn’t just recruit men to film with his wife in their home; he also did this at his daughter’s vacation home. One of the accused rapists told his partner to drive him to the meeting point and wait outside.

Guardian has done an impressive job gathering information on the accused men, who range in age from 26 to 74. The details are unbearable. Redouane A., 40, asked if it was normal for Gisèle to snore. “Yes, we like it,” Dominique said. Mohamed R., 70, a former disco employee, said he “cannot imagine for a split second that Dominique Pelicot would do this without his wife’s knowledge.” It turns out that Mohamed R. was already in prison for raping his daughter. There’s also Ahmed T., 54, a plumber, who says he thought, “Why not?” when Dominique invited him in 2019 to join him and the sleeping Gisèle. He testified that he thought she must have been shy. He testified in court: “I am not a rapist, but if I wanted to rape, I would not choose a 67-year-old woman, I would choose a pretty one.”

These statements, the 50 different versions of the story that the court will hear, are individually revealing and collectively astonishing – especially those that deny guilt. What would make it possible for anyone to think it’s OK to have sex with an unconscious person? How could a husband’s word be good enough as consent for his unconscious wife? When will we realize that age and whether or not a man thinks you’re “pretty” has nothing to do with rape? Hint: Rape is about power, not sex.

And finally: Didn’t the shoe drop when a guy asked you to warm your hands on the radiator because you might wake up his wife? Hurry up.

The outpouring of support for Gisèle, who showed up in court with her head held high, her hair cut in a bob and eloquent as hell, is the only balm for this terrible saga. It shouldn’t have mattered that she chose to testify with a pair of sharp shoes with her short, flowing dress, but what was touching was that she did: she had the pride and the heart to look fully herself, to stand up and stand out. It was a signal of rebellion and heart that showed that the men accused were unable to take away her spirit.

They didn’t take away her purpose. Her voice and intentions were clear: “I want rape victims to say to themselves, ‘If Mrs. Pelicot did it, we can do it too,'” she said. It was a rallying cry in a world where victims of sexual assault often feel let down and further abused by justice systems around the world.

“I express my desire to change society,” she said. Gisèle Pelicot goes beyond the fact that the trial has sparked calls to change the definition of rape in French law, which has already done so.